On my lunch today I was listening to a radio broadcast of the congressional hearings on whether or not to provide bailout money to the “Detroit 3” automakers. “Detroit 3”… Right there is a problem with the public perception; it sounds like a gang of bank robbers in the old west or a group of violent antiwar protesters from the 60s.
Anyway, it was educational, but hopelessly depressing. Everyone can go look up the details themselves, but the general consensus seemed to be that one or all of the domestic OEMs will eventually fail within the next five years. And as that is happening, the rest of the economy will continue to get much worse before it gets better. Even if the loans are approved, we can expect to see a continuing exodus of jobs from the state. I am left with a feeling of helplessness that I surely share with my fellow Michiganders. We will soon descend into a state of lawless chaos…apparently. Should I begin fortifying the house? Is it practical to add a bladed battering ram to the front of my Vue? Will that be enough?
I’m particularly worried about our neighbors to the north. I am not sure how the Canadian economy is doing, but I don’t expect that they could possibly be doing much better than us. Right? It’s cold up there and they may get desperate. I can envision raiding parties of hockey stick wielding vikings rowing their way across Lake Huron (Is my four-year-old big enough to wield a broadsword if he has too help defend the property?). On the other hand, I have to wonder what exactly would they be coming to pillage? All we can offer Canada is slightly warmer summer temperatures and rectangular bacon. Heck, at the rate things are going 80% of the state will be abandoned by 2012, so they can probably just move right in if they want. Nobody would even notice.
Maybe Michigan should just relocate now. The whole state. We could all band together and move en-masse in a giant caravan. We have to find someplace decent to settle, so we’ll be bypassing Ohio, Indiana, West Virginia, and Kentucky. I vote for North Carolina. Better climate, growing economy, and an ocean view in case we get homesick for the beach. And there are two Carolinas, so the current residents can move to SC, which would just become “Carolina” once New Michigan got settled. They can share and it’s greedy of them to hoard two perfectly good states anyway.
I forget where I was going with all of this. Oh yeah: Don’t listen to the news. It’s depressing.
1 comment:
Funny I was watching some of it on CSPAN today and inbetween the "I just pooped my pants' expressions on the CEO's faces,(along with rapid and unnatural eye blinking)and the smirk on the (R)Congressman kept on his face while telling them what horrible people they were I got a very good feeling for the following:
1. People equate Unions (specifically the UAW)on par with the Prohibition Mafia and have no sympathy for their eventual downfall.
2. Everyone blames the "Big 3" for 'making' us all buy big nasty SUV's but last time I checked good ol' supply and demand were in effect during the peak selling years. If we didn't buy them they wouldn't have made them.
3. Most non-Michiganaders already think Detroit is on fire 90% of the time and everyone there is on welfare so what do they care if Michigan turns into a 3rd world state?
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